Happy?

sweet agony finally takes its break from me,
i sigh a long breath of relief and look up to the sky smiling.
everything is ok now
please let it stay this way for a long time
could i be happy?

Laugh now cry later.......Or perhaps theres no need to cry at all. :)

Over the last few months things have been.....crazy...
i never thought i would make it through...:/ i didnt know if i would ever fully recover.
sometimes i really do still wonder.
but i have this new best friend nammed amanda. ^-^ she is the jelly to my peanut butter!!
her and i have been able to get really close after going through things together
and i really do think that with out her i wouldnt be doing as well as i am now.
we helped each other through some rough times. and i know i can lean on her and she knows she can lean on me.
latley things have been going really well. i mean life always has its ups and downs.
but why should i complain?
amanda and her best friend patrick are probably going to hook up soon and its unbeleivably cute! its like seriously watching a love story and i have been telling her all along that they should be together. EVERYONE sees it. except for her.
and me....ive actually found someone myself...:)
yes his name is chase. i always sorta had a little thing for him but nothing too big.
but then i got to hang out with him more over the break. he just does the cutest little things that make me go awwww inside. and he is really sweet.
i "married" him at the bowling ally at 1:01 am. april 11,2010
lol it was quite fun.
im really hoping things go well with chase because im thinking hes going to help me get over my past and have a good relationship again.
i suppose only time will tell ^-^
im alsot STILL in touch with friends with Michigan
which makes me feel really good.
because i guess it is true that true friends never really fall apart.
im actually hopefully going to be talking to ramon tonight again
and hopefully tyler soon.
theres other like lucas erin brandon tyler shep, aaron b....ect ect
and all this stuff added up just makes me feel good and gives me the strength to keep moving forward..
im not going to lie...im afraid of the future and im afraid of....welll alot of things.
but im getting stronger and stronger, plus i have all my friends to lean on.