Bad BreakUp

Ofcourse i should have known that this wasnt going to end well when it actually happend.
no matter what it would have sucked...and it does, but its alittle worse than i imagined. i feel bad about breaking up with him ofcorse but i think it was the right thing for me to do. but now everythings chaos. hes mad at me and truth be told id rather him sit there and be mean and yell at me than just sit there doing nothing but be upset and cry. igess i like it better that way because i probly deserve it.
ive been mean to him but it wasnt his fault i just felt...idk what was wrong with me.....i just need my space
but i feel bad for it
finaly hes admitting that hes pissed at me for being a jerk. im not exactly sure what made me be so rude sometimes but i think it was because i was trying to push him away, maybe i could make him not like me so then it would be him breaking up with me...not the other way around.
...but it didnt happen like that.
ill never regret going out with him though
he was my first real boyfriend and i still like him, sometimes i find myself trying to to stare at him. but still...i rly think i did the right thing. i had my reasons.
i just hope by the end of the year we will all be friends again
and i kinda hope he doesnt read this....he probly wont though he doesnt read my posts.