Just Not My Day....Again

I just got home from school today. It was a tuff day. Many things made me angry today.first, my bf Tyler got accused of touching me innapropriatly but he honestly didnt, but even though he tried to go talk to the teacher about it he is still getting a referal (which is like a pink slip) so that wasnt kool at all. and it was a success day so i was evrywhere trying to get some of my work done with tyler, And another thing that pissed me off was that i had three different classes to go to, science, english, and math. well i went to science first with tyler, and we got evrything caught up. so we went up to our science teacher to get our planners sighned to go to the nxt class, and i gess i was supposed to go to english nxt but instead i went to math. which was right down the hall and on my list. but i got into big trouble for that.....says mrs. G (my science teacher) she says she told me i had to go to english nxt but i did not hear her. And what does it matter any way?! i mean seriusly, ive got work to turn in to all three classes. and math was right down the hallway.
But i made a mistake. i shouldnt have even went to math anyways. my math teacher rarely helps me and if he does he has a way of confusing the hell out of me while explainning. It seems like whenever he is in a bad mood he has to take it out on his students. which REALLY pisses me off. I mean we are there too catch up on our work thats what our "success day" is for. And him as a teacher is paid and is sopposed to be helping us along. But he was vry grouchy and rude to the students going through there. not just me.

And i remember today going outside for recess which i hate! because its muddy and freezing outside and there is no reason why we connot be in the gym, i was standing huddled up nxt to tyler and evrything was just grey around me. there were other kids pushing and shouting and cussing, my friends close to fighting, and across the playground there was i big group of kids standing around these two mentaly challenged boys laughing at them and fallowing them around. seeing evrything like that made me vry sad and i just wanted to cry. because evrything i looked at today was vry negative. i tried not to cry in front of tyler though because i didnt want him to see me like that, because i know that it hurts him alot. but i just turned into my zombie state. where i just stood starring off into nothing ignoring evryone else.
But today wasnt completly bad, when i went to my choir class i went to talk to my choir teacher about my dad and problems i have with him. other girls were in her office while i was talking to her and as i was talking we all just sort of broke down and BAWLED OUR EYES OUT and shared. but it felt good. it felt good to me to know that thos girls cared about me. and that they were going thru hard things too. and even the girl i hate the most out of the entire school broke down right there with me and we hugged each other tightly because we knew that we were both going thru hard situations.

Life is really hard for me right now, yeah im depressed i cry alot of sorrow filled tears.
but it makes me cry of happiness to know that i have friends to talk to and friends to cry with.
and some how, even tho its going to be extreamly difficult. i AM going to get out of this sadness evryday. im ready to be HAPPY evryday again. not FAKE IT happy. but actually happy.